Below, you can see a picture of the actual phone used to accept the position:
Some might say the phone simultaneously embodies violence and sexuality. Notice the sharp lines and articulated contrast. Also note the "JOSH" label on the phone. This was done because my father and I have the same model phone. Honored though I was to follow in my father's footsteps of requesting the same free Sprint upgrade model, I thought it wise to label mine to prevent future embarrassing mix-ups. Not only is the label functional, but having a label with your own name on your own phone is a surefire way to get noticed. Sadly, this very phone, the instigator of my entire forthcoming adventure, will not make the trip with me. Fare thee well, JOSH phone, fare thee well.